YES MY DEAR LUCIA! i am going to update as I promised!! =)

I have not been really happy actually. A friend was really rude on the phone to me over really some stupid thing and yes we are not talking. and being a guy like him, I doubt I will never ever get the chance of hearing him apologise. It is kinda sad isn't it..where relationships with everyone is so vulnerable.

Personally, I dont know if i am suffering before departure depression. I dont want to leave. I feel sianz of everything. Even meeting with friends sometimes is becoming a difficult task for me because I don't feel like going out. Headache is becoming more frequent and I can't believe that I have made the decision to leave the rally team. I dont regret though because I think I am not ready. Maybe part of me feel I dont want this to replace the first rally that I had.

Somehow I wish for something different now.I know ..I just need to be happier and be more satisfied